Pretty strange of mine

I write nuts ;
just so you know

So called new year revolution

Sunday, January 3, 2010 ( 10:06 PM )

It's 2010 already. I forgot what's my new year revolution!

well, i don't understand why i have the urge to blog right now

but i just feel sketchy with the whole new year thing.

Anyway my new year resolutions...

My family which is my biggest wish,

hoping that 1 day i can have all my siblings and parents to hang out together.

The family thing is really cool, for some may think it's a bit cliche

but what brings u to the world?

your family for sure!

But i don't understand why sometimes she just wants to make things up.

The shouting part may makes u a winner but a loser for the family.

I mean if u can't even handle urself, what makes u think u can handle ur family?

Dad told me making a huge argument is not helping which i really agree,

i was wondering what if that day mum do things differently.

Could we end up differently?

I do feel upset when i see ppl chill out with family, really.

Many of my friends said that i was really optimistic

cuz i have a very complicated family

but there's only 1 thought makes me stand strong for it,

I can find my own happiness.

Secondly, i wish i can have more freedom.

Speaking of freedom, i just realised i already 20 this year.

Like hell ya, a 20 years old girl needs permission to do every little thing.

It's like a force for me to lie to do certain things.

I don't plan to do so but i do for the sake of my own freedom.

I didn't talk to her cuz i know when i really talk to her,

she would probably curfew me or something.

Maybe i did when i was drunk.

I feel unfair when she did that to me.

I would probably kill myself 1 day to end everything!

Nah, just joking! Suicide is an irrational act.

Maybe i would just run out of the house, really.

Cuz it sucks to obey everything and she just don't realised

that i did my job as a daughter.

It kills me when she said something really hurtful.

I don't feel good when i'm home.

I wish I can just go somewhere quiet and have peace of mind.